?

Log in

If you come softly [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Ousia

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

The Salt In Her Tears. The Venom On His Lips [Dec. 23rd, 2006|11:01 pm]
Ousia
[Mood |awake]
[Music |du du...]

Spitting poison
The Words so
Carelessly flung
of his tounge.
A funny man enraged
through the booze.
He doesn't see behing
his hard hand
The Fear in he posture.
He has never tasted
The Salt in her tears.
But as he turns away
He can taste
The Venom on his lips.





Here's a fun little song in German.

Du Du Liegst mir im herzen
Du Du liegst mir im Sinn
Du Du machst mir viel Schmerzen
Weiss nicht wie gut ich dir bin
Ja Ja Ja Ja
Weiss nicht wie gut ich dir bin
Link2 spoke|speak

Guakala! [Dec. 21st, 2006|05:55 pm]
Ousia
[Location |we just got a christmas tree]
[Mood |frustratedgross]
[Music |mix's im making for people]

It was so gross today. I was sick, but i wanted to go christmas shopping with my mom, so i was walking down this little street (more like a little ally where there are a bunch of venders selling jewlry and things) and my mom and Maya were somewhere wlse looking at things, and i didnt make it to a bathroom in time and threw up in front of a restaurant. It's one thing to throw up in public, but then to be yelled at and made to clean it up. The lady was so mmean. I think she thought i was hung over or something. But then these guys helped me. I was tottaly helpless, i was crying, and sick, and mad. I haven't eaten anything all day, i feel like CRAP. Well, im sure i lost some weight, thats good. :)

Maia's coming on Monday. I am soooo excited to see her. I haven't had a really good friend in a looong time. Lee and i decided that we still want to be friends, but that if we both didnt speak english, we would never have been friends. We're convenient , i guess. But she's still fun to hang out with, and a person to talk to.

I just spent the last 4ish days on the beach. It was really nive just to lay in a hammock and read, or swim, and eat the really y yummy salad that they had there.

My grandparetns (well, dave's mom and step dad) are coming on saturaday. I don't always get along with them so well, just like i dont get along with dave. I hope everything goes well. I hope they bring the really good chocolate that they always give as gifts. Its like, fudge. (is that selfish of me?) anyway, its reallly good.

I am soo in love with margaret. Damn, i miss her. I miss you. Fuck

i love you all
Ousia
Link14 spoke|speak

(no subject) [Oct. 21st, 2006|09:54 pm]
Ousia
    Je
                pense
   donc
                 de
        suis



(im feeling  philiosophical  i guess)
Link4 spoke|speak

You know who this is about i presume. [Oct. 18th, 2006|05:15 pm]
Ousia
[Location |this is my FIRST SONG ever]
[Mood |lonelylonely]

Te quiero
Te   <q u i e r o>
mi corazon


I need you here b e s i d e me
because
                                                           alone
                                                     am
                                                i

                                      you
                      without


when i realised
that i
wanted you
My whole life took a change
and
                                                       do
                                                  to
                                         what

                                  knew
                              just
                            i
                     then

Te quiero
te <q u i e r o>
mi corazón
i need you here beside me
because
                                                      alone
                                                am
                                            i
                                     you
                          without


Why do I need you?
Well, i just don't know
where to start

One thing I do know is:
                                                         heart
                                                  my
                                     without
                               live
                        can't
                    I

Link8 spoke|speak

(no subject) [Oct. 17th, 2006|08:03 pm]
Ousia
[Mood |i love margaret :)]

Oh MY GODDD
i just spent two hours driving around with my bitchy mom
we were going to an appointment of hers to get some cloths tailored
(because she's lost so much weight here- LUCKY) and i wanted my uniform fixed cuz i look like a
FUCKING BLOB in it
and so we drove around, it was a nightmare.
we were soo late, and we couldnt find it, and so we turned around and drove home
we got NOTHING done. what a waste of time
and instead of using that driving time to have a nice conversations (like I suggested) my mom kept saying
"i gotta keep my eyes on the road, fricking a!, this is so terrible, where the hell am i?, GO GO GO!, oh my godddd"

It wasn't fun

On the bright side....

ooh yeah
my friend lee's spening the night on friday and saturday and on saturday we're going to these crazy fast awesome go karts with my friend victor and some of his friends. yeah, at least i have something in the near future to look forward to.

GUESS WHAT??!! my dad's coming soon!!! yay. im so happy. he says he's coming the last 2 weeks of november and the first week of december,
these are the people i have to look forward to


1 My dad november/december
2 Dave's Parents christamas time
3 Maia late december, early january
4 Margaret february (so farr awwayy *sob*)
5 The bamis (my moms parents) idk when
6 The Bangees? idk when
7 My dad again in the spring

Yay
sigh of relife

i love you all
<3
ousia
Link2 spoke|speak

(no subject) [Oct. 15th, 2006|04:57 pm]
Ousia
[Tags|, , , , , , ]
[Location |In my underwear ( i meant that in the cleanest way possible)]
[Mood |productiveproductive]
[Music |Somthing on the radio]

So here are the things that I've been doing in the last couple days.

On Friday:
I swam in the freezing cold river at school (yes we have a river at school, super cool) diveing off the cliff on the edge and floating down until i got to the bridge, where i would hold on and let my legs be pulled by the water. My lips and hands turned blue, and my hands wouldn't stop shaking, but it was still really fun. Part of the schools philosophy is that the students should have lots of active time, outside, because it stimulates our growing brains. That makes sense, i was definatly super awake after swimming in the ice cold water, but then it was time to go home.

When I got home, there was this stinky swiss biker guy sitting at the table. Here is the short version of his story:
He's the chef at a ski lodge in the alps, and he's taking two years to bike from alaska, to chile. WOW that is a helluva long way i say, WOW. He's been biking for 5 months, 100 MILES A DAY! 9-10 hours on the bike. He camps every night wherever he ends up, and he carries his tent, sleeping bag, stove, german/spanish dictionary, various books in german he picks up along the way (which he says are very hard to find on the road in mexico) He speaks prett much NO spanish (he speaks english, obviously, because nobody really speaks german in my faminly) So, he stayed with us for two nights. My sister's bed was the first bed he had slept in since MAY, and the shower he took was the first one in months. GROSS.   A very interesting guy.

Later, I met my friend Victor at the central park and we hung out for a couple of hours. It wasn't a date, I'm not dateing anybody here because i already have BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL MARGARET. He's really nice, he's 16. We walked to another park, and rented a little may peddled bike, like the kind you can fit a whole family on. (I did that once i chicago...) and then we went to this bar, with colourful bean bags to sit on, don't worry, i only had one lemonade, lol, although i think if i had wanted to order a beer, i could have (i should try that and see what happens) When it was time to go home, it was raining, and my mom and maya were still in the park, so he drove us all home. Apparently he's been driving since he was 10 (laws are a little more relaxed here) and he also said that he could teach me how to drive! wooo!


Yestarday:

I went to my suzuki violin group lesson and my friends (the daughters of the teacher, Alison) Katie and Lee and I all played the slow movement of the Vivaldi concerto. It was nice, although i HATE ALL OF THE SHIFTS IN THAT PIECE! well, it was nice.

Then, after that, i went over to their house (Alison, Katie, Lee) to sleep over. I've already slept over a couple times, i feel so welcome at their house, like, i can just sit on the couch and read and nobody will care. They live in Coapexpan, a little town right outside of Xalapa. Their house is beautiful, and THE VIEW from their back balcony is AMAZING. they live above a valley, with wavey hills with cows and horses speckled around. That night, there was a lightning storm, with great white flashes jumping around in the darkness, lighting up the hills, and the sky.  David is an excellent cook. He made lasagna for dinner (vegetarian!) and we watched the producers later. Scones and mint tea in the morning.

Today:
Not much has happened so far. I'm sitting in my bra and underwear and erics jacket because it's really hot. My mom and I just walked down town to the little cental park (differnt park than the big one in Xalapa, because I actually live in Coatepec, it's really small) and we sat and listened to some guys playing guitar and singing, and did people watching.
Link21 spoke|speak

My senses in Mexico [Oct. 10th, 2006|03:58 pm]
Ousia
[Tags|, ]
[Location |In Mexico]
[Mood |groggygroggy]

Eyes:

Red, blue, yellow, green. Flapping hands, flashing lights. Dead dogs, giggling kids, and misty mornings. Fog in the florescent green moss, grass, leaves, trees.

These are things Ousia sees.


Ears:

Always asking, but I can't answer. Persistant voices commanding, yelling, crying, telling. Dripping, slipping, flowing water. Breaking dishes.

I hear, but don't understand my wishes.


Hands:

Itchy fabric, sticky paint. Biteing down on hard plastic. Clothes coming off, aching arms and troubled stomache, sitting naked on cold tile.

I feel my lips forceing a smile.


Nose:

Exhaust fumes, gasoline. The smell of something that's not been cleaned. Over-ripe orange sitting in juice, shit, and shampoo. Insense, the scent of a white flower.

I can wait another hour.

Mouth:

Water without flavour in a metalic water bottle. Beans, and chile powder, water of jaimaica flower. Burning tequilla mixed with blood. Soy sauce, and bile. Juice.

I have no excuse.
Linkspeak

(no subject) [Oct. 4th, 2006|04:29 pm]
Ousia
[Tags|, ]
[Mood |cheerfulcheerful]

"Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?" - Ernest Gaines

We would like to know who really believes in gay rights on livejournal. There is no bribe of a miracle or anything like that. If you truly believe in gay rights, then repost this and title the post as "Gay Rights". If you don't believe in gay rights, then just ignore this. Thanks.

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

OCTOBER 11TH IS NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY!!!!
i think im going to tell my parents.
Link6 spoke|speak

incense and common sense, rain and imaginary snow [Sep. 24th, 2006|05:06 pm]
Ousia
[Tags|]
[Mood |how the hell should i know?]

Im gonna make a quiz but its a special quiz

Whats your favorite color?

Tell me three things about yourself that you dont think i know

Do you love yourself?


Change the world

NOW

<3
so just answer all of those questions please
i loveyou!

Link7 spoke|speak

(no subject) [Sep. 18th, 2006|03:57 pm]
Ousia
[Tags|, , ]
[Mood |in-between]

take my quiz, bitches!
http://www.quizyourfriends.com/quizpage.php?quizname=060918165644-370309

Ok, so today, i was summoned to the office to talk with Hugo, an english teacher who is really really nice and he speaks english and he said: so ive been talking to the school social worker, and we've heard that you have been talking to people about how you like girls. Well, thats tottally fine, and we celebrate that, I am one myself. But, Im not sure if you know about cultural differences, It's much harder to come out here because it is much less socialy accepted.    me:uh huh, yeah, uh huh, right      him : so i don't want you to get hurt, I understand your situation compleatly because i've had to deal with the same thing. So if you ever need to talk to anybody, you can talk to me if you want. 

And he was really really sweet, and i left feeling good that he was so nice, and then also (even though i knew they were doing it) a little bit bad about people talking behind my back.
Link5 spoke|speak

navigation
[ viewing | 10 entries back ]
[ go | earlier/later ]